Your baby is not special.

Babies are boring and stupid. That’s not a criticism, it’s biology. Parent’s shape babies into adults that are, hopefully, neither boring nor stupid.

16e13fb9e6fcda7c39080a29a02b4a7cBut the fact remains that there are LOTS of boring and stupid adult humans. And guess what all of them, no matter how boring and stupid they may be, can do? They can have babies of their own. Even complete morons, provided some medical condition doesn’t otherwise prevent it, can have babies.

That’s why your baby isn’t special; at least not to anyone but you. That’s biology, too. You need to find your baby very special so that you’re compelled to keep it alive. However, you should be aware that your baby is, objectively, just as boring and stupid as the boring and stupid babies that morons create.

So when you present your baby to me, don’t be offended because I couldn’t care less. Congratulations, you had sex without protection. Whoop-dee-doo. That doesn’t make you special, and it doesn’t make the result special.

Now, if you raise that boring and stupid baby to become a decent, productive, and kind adult, then you’ll have my kudoes.

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